The Present of Presence

For the last four months, I have developed a daily meditation practice. But it is only recently that I am beginning to see my time on the cushion as merely a preparation for being present the rest of the day. In the beginning, I really viewed it like a workout. I did it. And while like rowing, biking or swimming, I was completely exercising. The rest of the day, I wasn't exercising. 

I think one thing that has helped me to be present and try to get my practice off the cushion is finding what I call "reminders of the here and now.” I'm sure there's some formal name in the Buddhist literature. It’s my name for the concept of, “when you’re washing the dishes, wash the dishes.” It also helps me that I am a “bear of very little brain.” I also tend to run on the tired side of things so by the end of the day I am actually better at doing one thing at a time. One of my cues for the here and now is my posture, more specifically, rolling my shoulders up and back and down my back. I’m trying to avoid my 92 year old aunt’s posture! If you think about how much time I spend on my laptop or driving or sitting, this is significant. I find that I am not only less sore and tired by the end of the day, but I'm able to really focus on the task at hand. It keeps me present.

The next stage of being a present me is to bring presence and awareness to my interactions with others. To be listening when someone is talking and not thinking about what I’m going to do tomorrow, or ruminating about some past event. Even more complicated is listening to something the other person is saying when a thought is triggered by their words. Many times this is a running woosh in my head. “Do I need to buy more paper towels for home?” or “Did I leave enough water in the dog’s bowl this morning?” or “I wonder what the weather will be tomorrow?” Posture, grounded feet on the floor and breath are all starting to encourage me to be more present. Letting those thoughts drift through without grabbing onto them and trying to answer them is complicated yet critical.

I am coming to see my sessions on the cushion as this wonderful respite or opportunity to completely decompress and slow down my mind--to stop wanting, wishing, hoping, ruminating and just be. It's unbelievably restorative and I’m hopeful that it’s beginning to make me more present when I’m off the cushion. Practice practice...not for perfection but simply for practice’s sake! Now I must be low on paper towels, off to the store!

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